VEALENTINES 2025

DISCLAIMER: I don’t think I have any followers who are under 18, but just so it’s abundantly clear: This commission offer is EXCLUSIVELY FOR ADULTS. Thanks! Now that that’s out of the way:

This year, why not show your valentine how you really feel by sending them some mysterious, custom smut? Each order gets you one custom painting with the lascivious subject matter of your choice on a handsome, vintage BABY VEAL butcher's tag. Once purchased, simply email me at [email protected] and give me a sense of what sort of thing you'd like painted (No need to be shy, but of course follow your comfort level! You won't shock me but you're welcome to try), and where you'd like it to be sent.
A $50 upgrade gets you the premium Mystery Mail feature, in which I will write your recipient a love letter from an unnamed admirer on the back of the tag and mail it directly to them. Nothing says I'M THINKING OF YOU like anonymous, horny snail mail after all! Of course, if you'd prefer a less mysterious gesture and would rather your piece be sent to you first for inscribing your own note or handing off in person, that is absolutely allowed as well, and naturally at no extra cost.

25% of all Vealentine sales will be donated to Midwest Immigration Bond Fund, who are working tirelessly to raise and distribute money to pay bonds for the release of those detained by ICE and free them from custody. Learn more about their work at www.mibfc.org